We used to share a room. Sometimes we would read to each other to go to sleep. I like Sam.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Comfortable this is Not.
New Years: Like a bunched up long sleeve inside your sweatshirt. Uncomfortable
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
newyearchristmakissmyassmakarmakiller
Why must we go through New Year's Eve and New Year's Day? Exactly to the extent I love Christmas, I dislike the whole New Year's business. It comes too close to Christmas -- holidays should not be stacked back-to-back, rather, they should be spaced out through the year. After eating and spending to excess for Christmas, you are supposed to indulge and spend again just a week later. New Year's Eve and New Year's Day serve little function other than insuring January Blahs.
Ideally, a holiday should be transferred to some dull month -- say, March. New Year's sort of must come on Jan. 1. Solution: move Christmas. No one has the slightest idea what day Jesus was born. The reason for the choice of Dec. 25 has been lost to antiquity. Probably it had something to do with the early church choosing a date to coincide with existing Roman winter festivals. Eastern Christianity uses Jan. 7 as Christmas, showing the arbitrary nature of the date. Move Christmas to March! Or at least downplay New Year's, our dumbest holiday.
New Year's is: Champagne, lookback on the year that was(when we really mean wasn't), awkward glancing around at 11:58 for someone to kiss, watching the one you really want kissing someone else, yelling at taxi drivers, cold, the most depressing day ever the next day-now what, bad music, indigestion, unfulfilled goals.
If anybody wants to make out, I'll be in bed at 9, looking up random things on wikipedia.
Ideally, a holiday should be transferred to some dull month -- say, March. New Year's sort of must come on Jan. 1. Solution: move Christmas. No one has the slightest idea what day Jesus was born. The reason for the choice of Dec. 25 has been lost to antiquity. Probably it had something to do with the early church choosing a date to coincide with existing Roman winter festivals. Eastern Christianity uses Jan. 7 as Christmas, showing the arbitrary nature of the date. Move Christmas to March! Or at least downplay New Year's, our dumbest holiday.
New Year's is: Champagne, lookback on the year that was(when we really mean wasn't), awkward glancing around at 11:58 for someone to kiss, watching the one you really want kissing someone else, yelling at taxi drivers, cold, the most depressing day ever the next day-now what, bad music, indigestion, unfulfilled goals.
If anybody wants to make out, I'll be in bed at 9, looking up random things on wikipedia.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Vote on Spiffy Dog's New Styles for 2010
Leave Your Comments, vote for 8, or rank them all. Do whatever, send me an email: kyle@spiffydog.com (click on image to enlarge). We will be choosing 8 new Designs, so your vote counts. We will send you a free keychain just for voting.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Top 10 Things I Hope Go Out of Style in 2010
It’s Tuesday, 9:39 AM, so the workday is “done.” But, rather than waste the next 10 minutes Christmas Shopping online(because I do that), facebook creeping, shuffling papers, and …I blacked out, I’ve decided to write my Top 10 Things I Hope Go Out of Style in 2010.
I wish I were more creative in the morning, but it's a start.
10. Vampires
9. the phrase “that’s what she said”
8. quoting lines from The Big Lebowski like its your favorite movie. Fuck off, you’ve seen it once and you don’t really understand the sheer genius of it.
7. “epic”, lol and :)
10. Vampires
9. the phrase “that’s what she said”
8. quoting lines from The Big Lebowski like its your favorite movie. Fuck off, you’ve seen it once and you don’t really understand the sheer genius of it.
7. “epic”, lol and :)
6. When people say "I've got 3 words for you..." and then say something like "Anger Manage-ment." Not clever at all anymore at all. I think you should say, " I've got 2 words for you, 3 syllables, a noun followed by an adverb forming a prepositional phrase." Or something.
5. People saying that the only reason Canada still exists is Hockey. That’s just dumb. Canada Rules.
4. WWF, MMA, PEDs,
5. People saying that the only reason Canada still exists is Hockey. That’s just dumb. Canada Rules.
4. WWF, MMA, PEDs,
3. third movies(re-sequels)-it’s so 1987, stop already. Unless we’re talkin Toy Story. (I could go on about this forever but will spare the time.)
2. Changing your name (see Ochocinco, Chad)
1. Reality TV…Actually let’s be honest, I’d love to see reality TV go just over the top. “Let’s have the audience weigh in on how the judges judged the judging of the competition.” And here’s one I’d really love to see: If Lebron were a marketing genius, which I believe he can be, he would market his free agency story of 2010 with a reality TV show. Call it “2010: LeBron’s Choice” or “LeBachelor” where he starts with 32 GM’s one from every team and wittles it down to 16, 8, then 4, 2 and finally 1, in which the GMs are put through rigorous mental and physical tests every week and then half are voted off at the end of the show. I like it, I bet he ends up in Canada.
1. Reality TV…Actually let’s be honest, I’d love to see reality TV go just over the top. “Let’s have the audience weigh in on how the judges judged the judging of the competition.” And here’s one I’d really love to see: If Lebron were a marketing genius, which I believe he can be, he would market his free agency story of 2010 with a reality TV show. Call it “2010: LeBron’s Choice” or “LeBachelor” where he starts with 32 GM’s one from every team and wittles it down to 16, 8, then 4, 2 and finally 1, in which the GMs are put through rigorous mental and physical tests every week and then half are voted off at the end of the show. I like it, I bet he ends up in Canada.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Top 10 Things I Hope Come Back in Style in 2010
How bout your standard Verdana Font...
Let's Begin
10. Jim Carrey
9. Ass Slaps
8. Credit Cards
7. White Collar Crime
6. Big Phones
5. Scooters-yea for the whole green thing, not for style, right.
4. Julia Roberts
3. Girlfriends-like who does that anymore?
2. Hot Pockets
1. The Pencil
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